Recent evidence that has surfaced via an unknown, yet highly reputable source, (Reuters, shhh!) gives unquestionable proof that first, Paul Simon is older than Jesus, and second, PEOPLE CO-EXISTED WITH DINOSAURS. That's all the proof I need to condemn carbon dating, and Carl Sagan
On a deeper level, this disturbing photograph reveals that Paul Simon is a warlock! How else could he appear to be a simple, robed, 30 year old man, riding on a brontosaurus, pre-Old Testament, and appear again IN THE MID-SEVENTIES, not having aged a day!! Following the infallible guide of Christian logic, PAUL SIMON MUST BE A WARLOCK.
WARLOCKS ARE AN ENEMY OF GOD!
I would love to have a coffee with that woman, and talk about how Paul "Warlock" Simon should be dealt with. After all, he is a blasphemous, evil traitor to God, just like Harry Potter.
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